13 Days of Mid-Sem

The summer holidays changed me. They made me restless and unsatisfied. They made me crave something more from life, be it independence, adventure or maybe just company. (My friend Nancy briefly touched on this in her own blog - you should check it out). It may be because I spent more time outside of my house than in it during the big break. There were nights when I would come home really late only to find that my mum had locked me out due to frustration. She usually got over it though so it wasn't a big deal.

I'd had a rocky start to 2013 (who didn't?) and yes, even though the second half was greatly improved, there were still moments where I felt really lost and confused as to where my life was heading. I mean, I had my shit sorted when I was in high school. Then university came along and it was like an emotional tsunami of confusion and self-doubt. Which is why the freedom during the summer holidays was so intoxicating. For almost 3 months, I forgot about the responsibilities and the oh-so-hazy future. I lived in the moment, left my brain behind and basically just ran far, far away from it all. 

Then university resumed in 2014 and you know what? It actually wasn't as bad as I thought it'd be. I was actually enjoying some of my classes. I still had no idea what the real-world application of some of the stuff I was learning would be but hey, at least it was interesting? But I realised that I wasn't concentrating on the work and assignments. I couldn't concentrate on the work and assignments. I was always itching to get out of the house, to just go or drive somewhere far away. Basically, my head was still stuck in summer.

So when the mid-sem break came along, I let out the hugest sigh of relief. For 2 weeks, I could pretend that it was January again, that I could come and go as I please. Of course, I still had assignments and presentations to prepare for but I barely touched them. I couldn't bear to bring myself to even look at them in case they dragged me kicking and screaming back into reality. Am I going to regret it when university resumes? Hell yes.

I was going somewhere with this but now I can't remember what.

Anyhow, ever since the holidays started, I have not spent one whole day at home. To me, that felt like wasting precious, precious time. It's funny now that I think about it because I used to be the biggest homebody. Staying home to read books and marathon TV shows was my life. Sometimes I think the restlessness and age of rebellion was just really delayed for me.

I did have fun this break though. I didn't catch up with everyone I wanted to but we'll have the mid-year break for that I guess. God, I can't wait. In the meantime, here's a photo from each day of the last two weeks (not counting the Sunday I worked).

I didn't take this one, obviously. (Source)